My complexion began to turn more golden red. I was serious. Even though Jill was talking nonstop she was the only person I wanted to talk to at the moment. I had my head tilted and chin down, gazing up with my almond-shaped chestnut eyes with the edges of my lips slightly turned down.
“Please, Jill? I’ll get Joel to handle the office in the morning,” I begged, showing the ticket at the gate for check-in. I pouted and put on sad eyes.
“Ky, I would love to, but I have to get home to Ari and Kayla. We’re going to the movies tomorrow.”
“Dang, Jill. I didn’t want to stay alone. I do understand that you have a life.”
“I noticed you were miles away in the taxi. Has Bryan done something?”
“Has he done something other than never sharing his life with me? Sometimes I truly believe I’m not the one for him or anybody else. I think I’m cursed or something.”
“What makes you say something like that?” She looked like I was the crazy root lady. We sat down at the gate to wait for boarding instructions.
“It’s a long story, but I know I can’t go home tonight. I’m staying in Cincinnati to think. This time I’m ending this fraud of a relationship. I wish I had someone to go home to. Sometimes I feel so alone. I want to be cherished like Ari cherishes you.”
“Ky, you worry me sometimes. I know several women who would love to have a paid man who pays them no attention, but I know that’s not your style. That shit gets old.” Jillian took my purse and helped herself to a piece of gum.
“You all should get away together.”
I flashed Jill a quick blank look. “You’ve known me damn near all my life, now do you remember us going anywhere together?” Jill closed her eyes as if she was trying to remember when and if…”
“No, you don’t remember us going on a vacation.”
“Give me a chance, Ky. I hate to see you like this. I’m really concerned about that curse shit you were talking about. I remember y’all going someplace. Remember?” Jill said, popping her gum.
“Yeah, I remember. Savannah for one night. That was a crock of shit. That wasn’t a vacation.”
“Ari gets angry when you go places alone. He always says, ‘Where is that asshole? She could get another date if she wanted to.’ Ky, I need to hook you up with a white boy. Look at you, you’re so beautiful.” She pushed my wind-blown hair away from my face.
My best friend, Jillian, with her hot chocolate petite self, always making me feel better. The big sister I never had. We’re the same age but her soul is older. A few months after her father passed away, right out of undergraduate school she married Ari, the Italian architect, three years her senior. She met him at Papa John’s Pizza at MLK and Northside. He was designing a new dorm at Clark Atlanta University, where Jillian was a sophomore. He treats Jill and their five-year-old daughter, Kayla, like royalty. I want to be loved like that.
“You would think a nigga would want to show you off, boo,” Jill said.
“ I’d think he would. I don’t understand but I’ll be okay soon. It would be okay if I were single and didn’t have a man, but there’s someone in my life who takes from me, you know? He takes what I have to offer, and I give my best. I don’t feel like I’m getting anything in return. If I were single, I wouldn’t be giving any of myself—no sex, no thought, no love.”
“I know what you mean, Ky. You are loving for two people. I can’t believe you guys ain’t been nowhere together. I mean other than Savannah for one night. I bet you get enough sex, don’t you?” She smiled sadly.
“Yeah, I get enough sex. You know him, girl. He might not have time to take me anywhere, but he can definitely make time for that. Sex has even changed.” Jill looked confused. I shook my head and continued. “It’s never been super, but lately he’s been really aggressive.”
“He didn’t hurt you, did he?”
“Naw, girl. It would be good if it wasn’t so different from what he’s been doing for the last three years but I can’t get with it because something’s up. Doesn’t feel right.”
“So he ain’t slapping your ass around or nothing?” Jill asked. I just looked at her like she was crazy. He would have to be crazy to even attempt that. “Shiid, just wondering. I don’t know how you deal with his crap anyway. What will you do in Ohio?”
“I’ll get a nice suite, go to the outlets and just chill—think a little bit, figure some shit out. Shoot back home tomorrow night. Could you ask Joel to feed Mizz Kitty and water my plants, please?”
“Sure. Anything else?”
“Naw. I’ll call Bryan from Ohio to let him know.”
“I wish I could stay with you because we could hit the hot spots, and I can act like I’m not married.” We both giggled as she ran her tongue across the gap between her two front teeth—guys love that gap. We laughed out loud—very loud. We boarded the plane giggling.
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